It's been a while after the last time I posted here. I finally go back to college. Technically. Few things change. I've been well but went through the worst time of my life. Few months ago, I decided to rekindle all the relationship that I had and stop blaming myself. It's been a long process of reshaping my path, or even better making a new one. Reconnecting with old folks I purposely pushed away is still the hardest part. The rush, the thrill, and the guilt of wanting something that I one-sidedly destroyed. Most of them are really understanding, the rest don't really pay no mind. Some of the healing parts are fun, like working out. My psychiatrist, just like any medical background people, told that it requires some chemical reaction to enhance your mood, endorphin or whatever, will be created through working out and any physical activities. Consuming medicines are just fine, since I was used to consume like five big pills every morning for six months constantly. The medicines are also part of the enhancing the mood through chemical substance, and also at the same time lowering your chance to overthink. In short, it helps you sleep and calm in general. It sounds pathetic, I know.
I'm also checking some of my long waiting list. I'm learning Arabic now; the progress is slow since I practically forgot almost every remnant of Arabic lesson ten years ago back when I was still in madrasah. I'm also taking Taekwondo class now. I'm not quite sure about competition since I'm like the oldest student in my Dojang and the rest of them are like high school students or even younger. But I'm really excited. I also finally make my own socialist theme Instagram page where I post book reviews. I'm still trying to upload consistently but since I'm always procrastinate and I'm always on my edge finishing my final thesis I'd be grateful if I don't abandon that page. I also trek now, not hike I'd probably faint right away but still a progress. I make a new friend, online, and also met one of them and already planned another trip with him. I'm writing this from Bandung, since part of rekindling previous relationships is also visiting your best friend, so that's what I'm doing.
So, that's my life update. I'll also try to upload my writing draft of socialism writing, be it socialist literature review, current issues based on socialist perspective, or just any casual writing that I've been doing since the beginning of this blog.
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